as a person, i feel that i am deteriorating. in many, many ways.
i don't know what i am doing, and the second i think i've got a grip on things, i fumble again.
i am quite afraid of what i'm growing into. i am indulging in the vengeance against nature, in a pointless, unproductive manner. perhaps destructive, even.
my name is a big burden to carry.

needless to say, consciously i am trying to work against deterioration. but the subconscious gets the best of me. if only it didn't affect the people around me, the people i really care about, i would have been glad.

flood in forest

not.. so sure where i got this from.
been watching a lot of supernatural and dexter lately. maybe the white nurse look is from House M.D.. beats me.

at least it's a change of colors. never painted in so much green before, i think.

photoshop cs.

WIP: forest flood

i know i was supposed to do more variation on the last one, which i did start working on actually. but i have this image that i just have to draw first. there'll be cute things added to this.

afraid to jump 1

photoshop CS

i plan to do more variations on this. this isnt how i pictured it to come out, but i felt too guilty of making so little strokes of colour. (i had really crispy cut out feel in mind. those are so minimalistically gorgeous)

WIP:afraid to jump

photoshop CS

i miss swimming pools.

because i

i smoke and drink too much. tone down? maybe if he breathes.

because i miss you.

photoshop CS

this winter

photoshop CS

back to the deadnessity of it all.
i simply love drawing just what i want to draw. i am not going to justify myself.

childish, a little wildish

photoshop CS
this doesn't say anything but boy did i have fun playing around. it's always hard to really make a decision on what looks good. plus it's a nice change from dark things, as some people have commented about the last few works.
oh title from damien rice's song-childish. how is is he so freaking good man. U_U

don't go

sketch photoshop CS. the comeback of the two chickas.

unwant dream

photoshop CS
gosh all those cigarettes.